You know what breaks my heart?
What has happened to the Boy Scouts.
I am an Eagle Scout, and I give my Boy Scout troop and its leaders a lion’s share of the credit for helping put my life on the right track.
I was raised by a single mom, lived with a sister, spent holidays with four female cousins, had three stepsisters and grew up surrounded by 13 girls in the neighborhood.
Boy Scouts gave me regular quality time with boys my age. We did constructive things, learned practical skills and discovered what we were capable of doing.
More importantly, every week several rock-solid men poured wisdom into my life. They challenged me to take responsibility, develop leadership skills and accomplish things I never thought were possible.
Yesterday, I encountered several Scouts selling popcorn outside Sam’s Club.
I forked over $20 for a 5-ounce bag of Trail’s End Sea Salt Popcorn. That’s $4 an ounce, but I didn’t mind because I thought I was supporting a cause near and dear to my heart.
As I walked away, though, I couldn’t stop thinking about how different the experience was from when my troop held fundraisers.
Yesterday, there were four people at the booth – two women and two tweens, a girl and a boy, who appeared to be about 12.
One of the mothers had to alert the kids that they had a customer. A mother collected my money, the girl handed me the popcorn and another mother thanked me.
The kids were wearing Scouting uniforms, but the adults appeared to be running the operation.
When I was in Scouts, we set up and staffed the booths ourselves. An assistant Scoutmaster might keep a watchful eye on us from a distance, but we did the work.
We approached customers, delivered a 5-second sales pitch and explained exactly what we were raising money for, which was often summer camp.
People would ask about the camp, our troop and how much money we had raised. We had to look adults in the eye, answer their questions, handle their money and thank them for their support.
That was the point. The fundraiser wasn’t just about raising money. It was part of our training.
Patrol leaders gained leadership experience. Scouts developed communication and sales skills. We learned responsibility and often worked toward merit badges.
We even used those conversations to encourage other boys to join our troop or to become Cub Scouts.
Yesterday, I didn’t see any of that. I saw adult women doing much of the work while the kids mostly stood a few steps away from the table.
Maybe I caught them at a bad moment. Maybe other troops still make their Scouts take the lead. I certainly hope so.
I don’t know enough about Scouting today to judge the entire organization based on one popcorn booth.
But, I know what Scouting did for me.
It gave a boy opportunities to do things for himself while good men stood nearby, offering guidance without doing everything for him.
That’s how boys learned responsibility, developed confidence and became leaders themselves.
The popcorn was never the point. The point was men helping boys grow into men.
I’m Grandpa Grumpy. During the five years I was a Boy Scout, we rarely saw girls unless it was a family event or perhaps an Explorer activity for high school age Scouts.
Today, Scouting America welcomes boys and girls, and more than one-third of its adult volunteers are women.
I’m not suggesting girls don’t deserve the same opportunities to camp, hike, learn outdoor skills and develop leadership. Of course they do. In fact, I wish my daughters had had access to those opportunities when they were in Girl Scouts.
But, I do wonder whether something important was lost along the way.
Boys also need places where they can spend time with other boys, guided by good men who challenge them, encourage them and show them what responsible manhood looks like.
Maybe that’s what bothers me most about what I saw yesterday.
I didn’t spend $20 for five ounces of popcorn because I needed a snack.
I spent it because 50 years ago, some good men invested their time in a boy who truly needed them.
Where do boys get that today? Tell me, where do boys get that today?