You know what really frosts my flakes?
Trying to save money at the grocery store.
It used to be simple. You walked into the store, found a few items on sale, tossed them into your cart and enjoyed the discount.
Today, buying groceries requires the planning skills of a military operation.
There are store sales, daily sales, flash sales, manager’s specials, paper coupons, digital coupons, app-only discounts, member prices and mystery sales that apparently only happen when Jupiter aligns with Mars and somebody sacrifices a rotisserie chicken.
The sale tags are hanging right there on the shelf, just begging you to buy the product. Then you read the fine print.
To get this price, you must scan a QR code with your phone.
To get that price, you need to clip a digital coupon.
This product requires an old-fashioned paper coupon from a newspaper that nobody has read since 1998.
That discount only applies if you buy five of the same item.
Another discount only kicks in if your total purchase exceeds some magical dollar amount.
Then, just when you think you’ve figured it all out, the checkout screen asks for your phone number.
Forget to type it in and suddenly those “great bargains” disappear faster than free samples in the deli department.
Some stores even track where you walk. Stroll past the produce department and your phone buzzes. Walk by frozen pizzas and it buzzes again.
Before long your pocket vibrates so much you think the family is trying to tell you there’s an emergency back home.
Nope. It’s just another alert letting you know that if you buy four jars of pickles, three cans of beans and a watermelon before 2:17 this afternoon, you’ll save 37 cents.
Well, cancel my afternoon plans!
Sure, I’ll drive five miles to save enough money to buy two bananas.
And don’t get me started on the apps that know what’s already in your shopping cart and immediately suggest three more things you don’t need. And it’s not because they’re “on sale,” but because Robot Grocer thinks you probably forgot to add them to the cart.
I’m not grocery shopping anymore. I’m participating in a scavenger hunt sponsored by the marketing department and managed by the IT department.
I’m Grandpa Grumpy and I’m too old for this nonsense. Whatever happened to putting an item on sale, charging everyone the same lower price and letting customers celebrate saving enough money to buy a cup of gourmet coffee on the way home?