Apparently some people think grocery stores employ magical elves who follow them around cleaning up after every bad decision they make.

Settle in because I want to talk about why viral videos and common sense rarely occupy the same cage.

The price goes up while the amount inside shrinks faster than Grandpa Grumpy’s patience.

Daylight Savings Time is the only issue that unites all Americans in common hatred of something other than politicians themselves.

Apparently surviving nap time and learning the alphabet now qualifies you for a cap, gown and awards banquet.

Apparently my website is impossible to find, which is impressive considering these idiots found it just fine.

Apparently, we’re supposed to choose leaders based on who can clutter the most intersections.

Shouldn’t traffic lights actually control traffic rather than test your patience?

We used to say grace before meals. Now people say, “Hold on, I need content.”