Apparently, companies and government agencies want to send me “important” messages all day long, but the second I have a question, suddenly nobody works there anymore.

You stay loyal for years by giving them your money, but they stay loyal to fine print and expiration dates.

They greet you with the same enthusiasm as a kid opening socks on Christmas morning.

Some of these places have no idea what their “average” even is. If every call takes forever to answer, then that IS your average.